hooba's husum's hangout

headin' to the heartland

2008-11-23T15:26:00.000-08:00

hail to the peeps from mediterranea,

hooba here with another update from that little slice of the gorge that really doesn't need palm trees to qualify as paradise. besides that palm trees are overrated and may be a bit wimpy to survive in our bucolic piece of heaven. hooba prefers the majesty of the firs and hemlocks that inspire the awe that makes one realize that most of them will be here longer than anyone of us. mix in the oak and maple and we have just enough color to appreciate the autumnal changes that prepare us for the winter ahead. hooba wonders why just 4 seasons?

for those of you sitting on the edge of your chair as you read it is finally time to submit the list of ORIGINAL COUNTRY SONG TITLES for hooba's soon to be released cd about the crap that most country artists know little about. all of you will decide which one should win the peeps "favorite" award. hooba has attached the list but the contributors shall remain nameless until the final results are announced much like election night when at the appointed hour one candidate was proclaimed the winner. hooba would encourage you to vote for at least two in case of tiebreakers etc. since young hooba will be out of the loop until next tuesday the voting will continue until the week prior to thanksgiving. like the previous election hooba encourages you to vote early and often. hell why not let one of your dead relatives weigh in. nothing says honest election like a few of the deceased as part of the tally. many thanks to hooba's sister and her gang for holding up the process and in the end not even being part of it when it was all said and done. obviously busy knitting and whatnot instead of participating in another rite of democracy. start your own contest and see what happens when everyone is busy knitting and not part of the festivities. birthday dinner next week might just be spamaroni.

hooba ain't much on tootin' his own horn so he'll let this speak for itself. our friends tom and becky dimarino dropped in saturday evening and it was great to see them both as hooba catered their wedding his first summer here in mediterranea. mind you part of the fare was smoked brisket, grilled salmon and all the accoutrements. those were the days prior to the hillbilly smoker so hooba farmed out the brisket. their love of all things bbq brought them in to try out the pulled pork sandwich which as most of you know is now part of the the menu thanks to john and his skills as a fabricator. evidently saturday's meal was tasty enough for them to return as our first customers sunday for lunch and lo and behold they ordered pulled pork sandwiches once again. that my friends, for those of you keeping score, would be back to back meals with the same result. should tom or becky offer any feedback hooba will pass it on but hooba would suggest that in itself speaks volumes about what the hillbilly smoker produces. he'll let you be the judge. if the rib night results are any indication hooba would encourage that you either show up or reserve your ribs ahead of time to avoid any disappointment on your part. turkey is the next meat for experimenting and if the results this week are able to be duplicated we shall soon have that in the mix as well. just in time for that which we are thankful. hooba will keep you posted.

our friend cheryl park has suggested that there might ought to be a cult like status assigned to the weekly update and for that hooba thanks here for her kind words. comparing hooba to jimmy buffet and the parrotheads could be a stretch but hey how did young, or should hooba say, old jimmy get started? that got hooba to thinkin' about his college days whence he took a class about "sects and cults" in america. mass suicide parties aside the class was a revelation to some degree. cheryl suggested "hoobaknots" as a moniker to identify those of you who appreciate many of the same things that those of us residing here in mediterranea do. hooba encourages that same feedback which is generally unsolicited from most of you each week. if nothing else a goofy t-shirt and a lifetime membership as a frequenter of hooba's might just be all you need to sign up. again weigh in on the topic and should it take on a life of it's own then so be it. hooba prefers crimson and blue for the colors as the JAYHAWKS are still national champs.

young hooba will be off to the wilds of central kansas later this week to have a visit with fast eddie and the rest of the clan to get an update on his cancer diagnosis and treatment. some of you met fast eddie and the gang last summer when they visited for a mini family reunion. rest assured that his fightin spirit will prevail in this latest battle. sis gets birthday dinner and hopefully hooba will get to visit other friends and family during his excursion. might even catch a football and basketball game on accounta it's all about being a diehard jayhawker. that means that next monday your screens will be devoid of the weekly missive so hopefully you'll all receive some spam or other crap to take the place of this well thought and hopefully entertaining diatribe as our friend chris fox suggests. imagine a week without the visit to mediterranea to reinforce that which makes life so beautiful. for those of you who have never been to kansas do not for a minute believe what you hear. the land of hooba's birth has a subtle beauty that you locals may not appreciate but nonetheless the sunsets and the ability to see from horizon to horizon is nothing short of spectacular. let hooba be your tour guide should you ever decide to visit.

another week passes and hooba would like to thank all of you who continue to keep this little dinghy afloat. great to see tony and bonnie, tom and becky of course, joel and adam, our friend matt, charlie, cheryl, and kendra, and the gang of gals from pdx for kristie's 50th birthday. not a bad place to celebrate whatever here at hooba's. thanks to all of you who continue to support and appreciate what we have here. trust hooba when he says that without all of you this wouldn't be husum's hangout. if you want any geegaws or other tourist type junk from kansas let hooba know and he will try to accomodate. evidently last weeks music trivia was a bit difficult so with that in mind we'll try again. name it and win free dinner or maybe a bottle of ketchup. "two doors down there's a bar stool that knows me by name" same deal with dinner for the winner. until young hooba returns from the land of oz he'll bid a farewell and will anticipate that you all will fare well as well. how bout that? pasta la vista baby.

hooba the manipulator

this weeks dinner winner is none other than kate wood who's off to colorado for the winter, we'll be here when she gets back

Hooba's Of Husum

shut up and vote

2008-11-03T09:33:00.000-08:00

standard time greetings to all,

hooba here at the beginning of the dark ages. the extra hour of sleep for one night would gladly be traded for daylight past 5 o'clock here in mediterranea for the next few months or so. here's hoping you all made it through halloween, all saints day, and dias de las muertos unscathed. being catholic hooba's question is that if some saints have their own day why wouldn't we call this one "the rest of the saints day"? might be time to give the pope a jingle for some clarification or in his case pontification. weigh in should you have the answer or know the pope's phone number. hooba really wants to drive the pope mobile so if any of you can make that happen hooba buys dinner.

now for the meat of this missive. after almost two years of declarations, primaries, campaigns, conventions, more campaigning, mudslinging, scrutiny, debates, red state/blue state, and the usual political nonsense, the election is finally upon us and not a moment too soon. hooba would like nothing better than to see this process streamlined into a 3-6 month courtship of the american voters. do we really need another 18 months of what amounts to spring training for politics. let's cut to the chase kids and join the 21st century along with almost every other country in the free world. all these ads clogging the airwaves are reducing this process to whoever has the most money and is willing to spend it tying up valuable tv time that eliminates our favorite commercials. in the good ol days prior to all this we saw viagra being pitched along with hair color, swiffers, cold remedies and all the other crap we really need to function as a democratic society. just think normalcy returns wednesday unless you're counting on the winner to fix the economy, end the war, provide universal health care, or to give us hope that the future really is better. that said hooba would encourage everyone to just shut up and vote or quit your bitching on tuesday. hooba would suggest that like many of you who are small business owners do we really think it's going to be any different anytime soon? hooba will continue his loyalties to the JAYHAWKS and remind you all that "national champs" is still part of the equation until daylight savings time returns. oh by the way we kicked k-states ass on the gridiron yesterday because of what they do to cows.

many of you have indulged hooba with tales of your trips to vegas and various local casinos and occasionally embellished your winnings by zeros or decimal points. hooba is not a big advocate of gambling unless of course it's with someone else's money or you know a sure bet when you see one. halloween night hooba was having a discourse with a customer, who shall remain nameless, about a certain crackpot who presents himself as a spokesperson for the downtrodden and oppressed. seems that indiana jones was convinced that this person was an elected member of the congress/senate. hooba begged to differ and was willing to leave it at that until something was mentioned about a wager of some kind. as most of you know hooba will tell you when he's right and frequently more than you want to hear it. in this case hooba KNEW he was right and was ready for a friendly wager to prove a point. a gentlemen's bet wasn't in order in this instance and for the first time ever hooba decided to "bet the farm" which in this case would be the mortgage on the crib just down the road. ballpark wager @ 180-200k. hooba ain't exactly got that kind of scratch laying around but since he knew he was right it really didn't matter. the bet was made with witnesses who shall also remain nameless. this same computer on which i type at this moment provided the answer and lo and behold young hooba was correct. under ordinary circumstances hooba would be willing to renegotiate post affirmation but the mere fact that the house payment had been eliminated in a few short minutes of gambling he was prepared to take a personal check for a deposit and the rest in cash on monday. oh but wait, it seems a technicality of no small significance had been overlooked. there was no handshake involved so that nullified the bet. imagine hooba's chagrin when he realized that his house was still owned by the bank. let that be a lesson to you would be gamblers. hooba ain't much on handshakes but he will continue to kiss babies.

we'll bid our friend kate wood adieu for the winter next sunday night with a little get together here at the restaurant. many of you ask about kate and what she's up to so that would be a fine opportunity to drop by and wish her well as she heads off to colorado for the winter. we'll have libations and maybe some alabama round, pocket burgers, and nutty buddies for your dining pleasure and then again we might be cranky and tell you to eat pretzels and like it. let's make her want to come back because what would the neighborhood be without her smiling face? i'll remind you all that RIB NIGHT will continue on saturday's until further notice as it seems we may have another product from the hillbilly smoker that is quite tasty. the reviews have been favorable and should they not be we'll encourage you to go elsewhere, like there's anywhere else serving real smoked bbq. THIS WILL BE THE LAST WEEK TO ENTER YOUR ORIGINAL SONG TITLES for hooba's country cd contest. hooba shouldn't give you lollygaggers more time but it seems his sister and her knitting crew would like to get in on the action. hooba has gleaned 10 songs from those entered to this point and will add a few more of the best for you all to vote on next week. don't say you weren't warned.

many of you send thanks every week for the update and hooba thanks you all for the kind words. now and then someone dares to ask to be removed so hooba will say that removed is forever. thanks to all of you who dropped by these past few days including--marty and becky from the dalles just to have lunch at a cool place, kevin and jan who continue to support this venture, mary beth and stephen for their first trip to our little slice of mediterranea, marchal, doris, karen and the clan for enjoying the ribs etc., sue and gary again for the thank you note, our friend dave grove who's off to mexico for the winter, and bev and bernie because they get it even if bernie thinks we're closing early. thanks to all of you for your continued support and positive feedback. we ain't going anywhere unless hooba wins the lottery. this weeks music trivia is--there was two of everything and one of me and when the rains came tumblin' down i held my breath and stood my ground--you know the drill. no googling that's cheating. until next week hooba says vote early and often. see ya around like a donut.

hooba chad's hanging cousin

this weeks dinner winner is lloyd fink cause he's a good golfer

whack attack

2008-10-26T16:24:00.000-07:00

a huge hooba hola to the peeps

hooba here watching the moonshine over the mountain. the orb in the sky not the juice in the jug. sunday's update must still be circling in cyberspace as apparently it hasn't reached any of you. i'd like to thank those of you who sent your home remedies for poison oak to young hooba. between bernadette, a doctor and a dermatologist we seem to have cured the rash. hooba and gus send a big thank you to all. should it happen to any of you hooba will forward the salve.

many of you ask how things are going with the seniors in west linn and hooba appreciates your concern. seems this week there is a bit of a bug in the neighborhood and that means many are enjoying a liquid diet. it's ashame that the flu shots are still a week or two away but that will not deter the kitchen from delivering what the peeps want. hooba and some of his fellow workers have started bowling on monday nights in a co-ed league in tigard and quite honestly we ain't that good. thank god for the handicap as it's worth about 200 or more pins a game. the "gutternauts" have shirts but are just good enough to avoid being killed every week and thus far we're in a battle for first. hooba will keep you posted. seems he can't crack the 200 mark but it's on the horizon. it's the shoes ala mars.

hooba sends a shout out to his friend mike in phx for sending a cd he burned for the folks here at husum's hangout. plenty of great country music and some humor mixed in for grins. nice work mike and thanks again. that got hooba to thinking about recording his own cd of country tunes. when hooba thinks country he thinks about some of the same crap you hear on the radio nowadays. seems it ain't country if it ain't all about "lovin', lying, drinking, and cheatin' ". hooba and a bunch of them hollywood stars have many similarities in that department. that said this cd will be chock full of sure fire hits for your listening enjoyment and could be a platinum chart buster. don't think for a minute that hooba hasn't considered this before but the timing happens to be just about right for his foray into the nashville sound. here's a rundown of tunes that will get your toes tapping and bring a smile to your faces. let hooba know what you think.

you aren't the first whack job i've dated

let's be honest, just don't expect it from me

my neighbors recycle is full of my empties

why get a job when i'll find a sucker to be my sugar daddy?

need space? check between your ears

my expectations don't apply to me

are you sure there's more to life than sleeping, drinking and sex?

i met him for lunch and left you before dinner

how much chardonnay is too much chardonnay?

you thought i was a mess and then you saw the trailer

i thought supertramp was an 80's rock group

if any of you have suggestions or changes let hooba know before he hits the studio. rest assured you'll be the first to get this one time offer via email or the website. there will be no shipping or handling charges as that generally is where these kinds of hit cd's make there money. should there be a profit we'll give it to charity, which lately the restaurant falls into that category. like hooba always says "if that ain't country i'll kiss your ***".

now onto more pertinent things such as the "RIB NIGHTS" which will begin this saturday. the kinks have been worked out of the hillbilly smoker and john and hooba are confident that we can deliver a product unlike any other here in the gorge. like the menu itself the price is yet to be determined but rest assured that the ribs will be the equal of or surpass the pulled pork sandwiches. the mere fact that you can't get them elsewhere should be enough. hooba will let you decide if they are worthy.

hooba would like to thank our friends who've dropped by in the past couple of weeks and they include michelle and teri from seattle who were in for golf and lunch last sat. the gang from the inn of the white salmon as we seem to be on the same page. marsha and the media tour for including "husum's hangout" in the activities of the day. marsh, doris and karen for going back to back last weekend. gerry and smasher even thought the bears lost and certainly not least of all mike and jessica for playing scrabble and watching playoff baseball. we'll continue to blaze the trail for those of you who wish to be a part of it and in the meantime hooba will sit on the porch staring at the magnificent example of god's creation while thinking about all of you who continue to be the best customers around. as the fab four would say "the love you take is equal to the love you make". name the song and the album and win huge prizes. be happy and vote.

hooba the songwriter

this weeks dinner winner is our friend mike walker, a real live nephew of our uncle sam

hooba changes his underwear

2008-10-26T16:06:00.000-07:00

greetings fellow fashionistas,

hooba here on a rare thursday night to regale you with an update from mediterranea. the weather is precisely why we live here. granted it's only two or three days a week for me lately but nonetheless outstanding for the end of summer. with football now part of the equation hoobas' thoughts drift to fall and the anniversary of his birth. should any of you care, and if the good lord is willing, he'll celebrate another year on this tiny orb in a couple of weeks. hooba would prefer you hoisting a cocktail or beer instead of showering him with expensive gifts as he's already got a bunch of crap that he can't even begin to find a home for. hooba's not sure he has a home even though he owns property in different counties and has a swell little dive here in the wilds of the gorge. he'll let you know when it happens.

it's not often that young hooba decides to make a major change in his attire and as most of you know shorts are always the togs ju jour, so it was with some reluctance that he took the advice of a fashion consultant and decided to change his most personal attire. seems that boxers are not the choice of the metrosexual crowd anymore as they have been replaced with boxer briefs. hooba is anything but brief but took the leap of faith thinking that it couldn't hurt. although painless, imagine his chagrin when standing at the urinal today as those said briefs were on backwards. routine being what it is as we get older he was ready to relieve himself when low and behold he was confused when access to the plumbing was denied by the very fabric that makes these boxers brief. he thunk surely a design flaw but upon further inspection hooba realized that indeed the accessory he was most accustomed to with the antiquated version of boxers was on his backside. hooba never gave much thought to what change might bring but rest assured he was not happy. if hooba's mom were here she would have put his name in the appropriate place to avoid confusion. the old days whence young hooba wore no underwear at all seem better suited versus a fashion faux pas. perish the thought mi amigos. should you like to weigh in on the topic please do so but please be brief. you knew that was coming.

while practicing his third person hooba would like to remind you all that we shall close early sunday for a catered event here at the restaurant. hooba don't do politics but when money is involved he will be the businessman he should be. at 2 O'CLOCK we'll be hosting a fundraiser here for the duration of the afternoon and evening. since politics and religion don't mix here at hooba's what better day to have something like this than sunday? hooba ain't tellin' ya who to vote for rather he would encourage you all to vote. at this point he's leaning toward the duo with that hot chick from alaska. think about it. what says "america" more than teen pregnancy and gun totin' governor? that's a joke. when it's all said and done hooba will continue to vote third party in hopes that at some point in the future we will have a legitimate third choice. if nothing else watch football while realizing that we still live in the greatest country in the world. china might have won more gold but we won more medals. who invented the swiffer? you get the picture.

there is a menu change in the air here at the restaurant. many of you wonder why we don't advertise the pulled pork sandwich on the menu board. much like advertising itself don't you all think it better that the regulars should know more than the first timers who wander in off the highway thinking that we have french fries or ranch dressing? things won't change dramatically but there will be minor adjustments. if you need a reason to go elsewhere rest assured we'll provide it but as you all know the food here is pretty good although the service a bit suspect. would you want it any other way? the hillbilly smoker has potential for more as some of you may have experienced when john smoked the wings last weekend. dare to eat steak.

hooba will sign off by giving a shout out to our friend paul "the fearnicator" fearn as evidently he aced the 17th hole at orchard hills this past week. had hooba not himself had a hole in one in his golf career he might be envious of the accomplishment. good for you paul. hooba will say that a hangover is no match for the adrenaline rush you get when holing a shot on the links. the next one's on me my friend. thanks to rick and mary for visiting this past weekend and our friend ailona for bringing her crew up for golf and dinner. the beauty of this place is that it knows no boundaries and other than the fact that the proprietor has his moments it tends to be rather accomodating. we continue to encourage the best customers and the coolest people in the neighborhood to drop in anytime. lest we not forget that the JAYHAWKS are still NATIONAL CHAMPS and the football team is off to a fine start. tune in at 4 pm saturday on fsn to see for yourself. for those of you who wonder why we have no oregon flag hanging out front get real. do you live in oregon? if you do why not get a university of nike flag and maybe we'll consider putting it out with the jayhawk and washington banners. until our next chat i will leave you with this--when i die don't bury me down in that cold, cold ground, just cut me up and pass me all around--thanks to john prine and all of you. be well and happy.

hooba the abstractor

this weeks dinner winner is molly m simms

where have you gone joe dimaggio and hooba?

2008-10-14T21:38:00.000-07:00

yikes not only weeks but months since the last post. many of you know that i send a weekly update from mediterranea that qualifies as blogging. if you'd like to be part of that equation send your email address and we'll make the necessary arrangements. i'll try my best to reacquaint myself with blogdom from here on out. seems that hooba gets writers block when it's time to sit and type but then myriad topics come to mind when i'm working or driving back and forth between husum and west linn. we'll begin a series of sonnets or novellas for your reading pleasure on topics that interest most of us who live not so normal lives. kind of like those saturday movie shorts back when we we're kids. you remember the old days we hope and if you don't then just wing it. if you have any suggestions please send them hooba's way and he'll take them under advisement. let's try to keep it at least r rated so the chillins can participate as well. hooba will add photos as needed or at least drawings or sketches. that's all for now as it's bed time. maybe bed time stories are a swell place to start. let me know. pasta la veesta baby.

mt. adams shows it's mediterranean side

2008-02-17T23:58:00.000-08:00

greetings mountaineers

hooba here with great news from mediterranea. our friend mt. adams has shown it's face again after a few weeks being awol. might be i haven't been around to see it but today it truly shone in all it's glory. for those of you church goers i would encourage a visit to the porch here at hooba's to experience just what the almighty has to offer. our church without walls is one of a kind. the burgers run a distant second. we do have four pews for those of you who feel it necessary to kneel.

the very large tv is up and running thanks to mr. haney, ian and john. safe to say it's the largest in husum and most likely the surrounding area. nothing says great bar like a big screen even if we don't give a rat's ass about nascar. apologies to gerald who enjoyed every minute of today's race. i would anticipate that we might even consider showing figure skating in the future as we're all about equal time, kinda like the campaign ads. speaking of campaigns hooba is considering an amendment to eliminate neckties. since i don't own one why should anyone else? methinks it constricts the flow of blood and relevant thought to the brain. some of you may have to wear one to work but i'm thinking your iq would be higher without it. just a thought.

i thought a little movie trivia last week might stump most of you but was i surprised. scott, jim, jim, paul, lorrie, and our own kate wood knew of what i spoke regarding peter sellers and being there. hooba ain't much of a movie goer but chauncey walking down the median in dc to the sounds of 2001 a space odyessy after losing his gardening job is a classic. name this one, nobody get's out of life alive, and the movie, and the star, movie junkies. more swell prizes for the right answer. andria found the boot with a bit of help from a modrich so it could be time to be more discerning on where it's hidden. imagine your glee when you find it when not even looking.

ratso the catso just realized that this is the year of the rat in china. imagine her surprise when they honored her with an entire year of festivities. since her trip to the vet she's celebrating like she knows how to party even if the venue is only a half acre with assorted junk and crap. she loves the crib as do the owners. i would encourage all of you, who like myself were never cat lovers, to get a stray form the humane society and let'em loose. ratso has better insurance than yours truly. mine starts march 1.

the winds of change are blowing and for some reason winter wasn't as bad as advertised. i'm contemplating live entertainment starting in march with a local crew who seem to carry a tune or two. i'll keep you posted. my ku prediction last week was not quite accurate but hey we can't win every game. so long as we show up march 31st i'll be happy. i would encourage you all to be happy and let us know what we can do to make your lives easier. until next week i'll remain contemplative.

hooba the contemplator

Hooba's Of Husum

ratso to remain neutral but endorses hooba's fish tacos

2008-02-10T23:41:00.000-08:00

greetings loyal customers and friends

hooba here hoping all is well and you're not going through football withdrawal. nothing like an outstanding pro bowl to end another nfl season. quite the super bowl eh? thirteen of our loyal customers were on hand at the first annual super bowl party here in husum. when you're selling 10 cent squares for the pool the payout tends to be not so much. that was joel's idea. yours truly is already looking forward to spring training with great zeal while anticipating a jayhawk final four run. i like our chances. who's running for president or should i ask, who cares?

ratso the catso is weighing in on the coming election by accepting a life of neutrality. friday she was rendered swiss for life by a local animal plumbing specialist. much like her owner she's proven to be less than a model patient. seems low key and sedate wasn't what she had in mind upon her release a mere 24 hours after surgery. her return to the hacienda excited the little feline to such an extent that running, jumping, and frolicking, against advice from a professional, would make her the poster cat for recovery and rehab. could have been the pain medication. we admire her spunk and appreciate that the homestead won't be overrun with kittens courtesy of some local tom. is there a tom running for president?

thanks to all of our favorite regulars for dropping by this weekend to brighten things up a bit. the distance traveled by our friends dave and eva from vantucky and jim's crew out goldendale way once again proves that mediterranea truly does exist here in the wilds of the gorge. it helps that most of the snow has melted to insure that we do have grass and dirt below. trout lake is a different story altogether i hear. as chauncey the gardener would say, "there will be growth in the spring." name the movie and win swell prizes. if the green boot ain't found soon we'll retire it to the to the foot it came off of.

some of you have expressed interest in having a little get together to view next weeks "redneck road race" from daytona. relax. thanks to our friend chuck, hooba has procured a very large plasma tv for our viewing pleasure. there's no guarantee it will be fully operational but john says he'll try to make it happen. plan b is the zenith which has served us well up to now. the quality goes in before the name goes on. since my favorite left turn is the one that gets me home each night i'll plead ignorance on how that nascar stuff works. i'd come, like most of you do, just for the food.

i was chastised mercilessly this weekend for not being regular with the news from mediterranea. moonlighting has affected my schedule moreso than anticipated. i'll try to start the week with the husum update hopeful that it will make many of you forget it's monday for as long as it takes to delete my ramblings. the wine event is a go so send suggestions. more later or at least next week. where's the harmony?

adios hooba the administrator

ku 88 texass 79

HomeComing

2008-02-10T14:56:00.000-08:00

Hooba's Homeland Homecoming! The big Jay meets Hooba and some dude from SoCal. Big Jay loves the killer burgers and an occasional Fish Taco, Jay style.

cut and paste practice for dummies

2008-02-10T14:43:00.000-08:00

The below illustrates how easy copy and paste can be…can be.

So,
Preparation (2 minutes, maybe):
Open 1 new BLANK email message to me (yeah). KEEP OPEN
Right click on start, click on Internet Explorer, go to killerburgers.com. Open 1 blog comment. KEEP OPEN

In the blog comment, LEFT click at the beginning of the first paragraph, HOLD the LEFT click down, move mouse to end of paragraph. RELEASE LEFT CLICK. You should see the text is now highlighted. NOW, simply RIGHT CLICK ANYWHERE ON THE HIGHLIGHTED SECTION and see some sweet choices. Then, LEFT CLICK on COPY.

We are now going to Toggle (Toggling is a lot like whisk/whipping with a ‘puter) to the blank email message.

Look at the bottom of your screen. Find a tab, square anything that says outlook message, LEFT CLICK on tab, square (whatever it is) MESSAGE title.

You should now see the blank email message. You have successfully toggled to a blank email message and are ready to blend all ingrdients.

LEFT CLICK anywhere in the message, which places the cursor where you want to put your comments. Now, RIGHT CLICK for more sweet choices. LEFT CLICK on Paste!!!
VOILA, you have now pasted your highlighted text in the email! So tasty!!

The advance lesson discusses changing fonts, ect. Let me know if you get this email!

EXAMPLE:
i've returned to the land of my birth and am just tickled to be here for visits with friends, family, my alma mater, and the landscape which so many of you in the great northwest consider to be flat and non-descript. a much needed respite from the grind provoked a trip to the midwest for the cure. kansas my friends is not a place to drive through or fly over and think that you've seen all you need to. i'll enlighten should you continue reading.

elizabeth whelanhood river oregon

greetings from the land of oz

2008-01-21T22:00:00.000-08:00

hooba here

i've returned to the land of my birth and am just tickled to be here for visits with friends, family, my alma mater, and the landscape which so many of you in the great northwest consider to be flat and non-descript. a much needed respite from the grind provoked a trip to the midwest for the cure. kansas my friends is not a place to drive through or fly over and think that you've seen all you need to. i'll enlighten should you continue reading.

i flew into kansas city yesterday to experience life in missouri for about an hour. winter is steadfast in january and the cold, wind and snow had many at the airport questioning my fashion sense. most of you realize i lack sense and pants so shorts are probably what most of the locals consider abnormal. i beg to differ as the increased circulation inspires the faculties. my intial observation of the portly airport cops made me wonder why airport food gets such a bad rap. if these dudes missed the low fat wrap or salad offered in the concourse i would argue that it was by design. they should be wearing shorts and the fat melting waistband versus the kevlar vest. enough about one of the country's worst airports.

my weeklong junket proceeded to the ol' hometown today and i'd be remiss if i didn't alert you to the sign outside emporia that advised that we should accept jesus christ as savior or regret it for life. in an election year it occured to me that allah or any other god should get equal time and billing even here in the bible belt. hooba's all about acknowledging a higher power but to exclude those that others worship seemed a bit narrowminded. after all isn't one of the premises of our fine country the freedom of religion. sounds like eternal damnation is waiting for me at the end of the line should jesus christo and i not be drinking pals. seems i meet more like him in places such as bars. in fact i'll drink more wine as i type and pontificate.

for those of you who reside in the northwest and constantly harp on the winter weather being cold, gray, and rainy i would suggest a trip to a place such as this on a day like today. the damp, sullen, gray skies are of the 180 degree variety. the entire horizon reminds you that those bits of sunshine between clouds at home are non-existent while the fine frozen mist that engulfs the landscape can easily turn driving or walking into a skating adventure unlike anything you've endured elsewhere. it tends to highlight the beauty of the stark surroundings you drive through. wind is a constant factor whether it cuts through or around you and everything else. you become more cognizant of what it takes to survive in a harsh environment that lacks trees and the variety of clouds you're accustomed to seeing. hooba says quit your whining or spend a few weeks in a place such as this to realign your thinking.

this trip will include some r and d for bbq in hopes that we can add it to the menu in the future. i would encourage you to educate yourselves as to what bbq really is. forget the sauce and start with the wood and the smoke. smoked salmon is an entirely different beast or fish as the case may be. remember that salmon doesn't exist where bbq is king. this weekend i anticipate savoring some of the finest kansas city has to offer. i hope to at least duplicate a version in husum that will make the locals proud. don't get me started on mexican food. if you can't cook beans and rice how can you think you could possibly reproduce the original?

i'll leave you with a reminder to look for yours truly wednesday night at allen fieldhouse via espn. my nephew kelly has provided me an opportunity to watch my beloved jayhawks play some hoops and keep their undeafeated season alive. we'll call it ku 89 isu64.

hooba who regrets little if any

like resolutions really matter

2008-01-07T21:10:00.000-08:00

happy new year

like most of you i have already rid myself of those nasty resolutions and it's on to the business of facing the daily grind with or without heaters, fat, alcohol, mates, or whatever other person, object, vice, fun, etc. i decide to try and live without for a week or so to begin the new year. now that the road ahead has been cleared for the remaining 51 weeks i can begin to strategize and come up with a real plan for success in 08. i anticipate the year ahead to be chock full o nuts and opportunities to do something different or significant that might just put this little endeavor on the map or at least a short video on you tube whatever the hell that is. my web designer has assured me that a "how to" video on killerburgers will be the shit for you and your tube. i'm thinking more along the lines of cable access myself. if nothing else i will be more resolute on behalf of the blog.

while surfing the cable networks today i ran across a promo for a show that essentially is about extreme makeovers for single wide mobile homes. you know kids where i grew up those makeovers occurred frequently in groups of 10-100 and were usually done simultaneously by none other than the mother of all designers--MOTHER NATURE herself.-- we called them tornadoes and the result of a few seconds of makeover was generally the most scintillating and breathtaking result you could possibly imagine. where once there was a rickety structure of tin and aluminum surrounded by lesser farm animals, pets, rusting cars or trucks, outdated farm equipment and lawnmowers, various amounts of garbage, pallets and a charlie brown christmas tree or two for landscaping purposes and beauty, the results of the nano second makeover we're truly astounding. imagine all that crap relocated in the same general vicinity minus the tacky aluminum box which has been shredded to add just the right touch of metal and sculpture to the living canvas. as many of you know, anything or anyone outside the box during the tornado makeover generally survives with a true appreciation for witnessing firsthand the master stroke that the world's pre-eminent designer creates.

we have a handful of those very same eyesores up and down the valley here in mediterranea but unfortunately we're not exactly overrun with tornadoes. for now we shall endure the shortcomings and hope that "single wide extreme makeover" makes it's way here before the realization hits the network executives that only a small percentage of the population enjoys watching their cousins get new digs while the majority of us would settle for a bulldozer should mother nature not have the time or inclination for all the makeovers needed throughout the single wide universe. i've had an eye on one here from the get go and hope to procure it soon for what will hopefully be a happy, festive occasion when the producers find their way to my front door with the great news that my tin teepee has been selected from among thousands for that 3500 dollar sprucing up that it and so many others deserve. now that's reality tv if ever there were such a thing.

maybe i should stick to food. don't get me started on rogaine foam. something tells me that product will find it's way to places that shouldn't have hair. imagine the havoc it would reek should our less than furry friends get ahold of that. we'll surely put a warning on the can. i think it's time to shave my head again. i'll try to post a photo of some of the neighborhoods' finest wobbly boxes soon so we can alert the tv folks that we have makeovers waiting to happen. until next time.

eat more killer burgers

jayhawk pride and leftovers

2007-11-25T23:02:00.000-08:00

ya ta hey kiddos

hooba here after a long hiatus from blogdom. i purposely avoided doing so until the jayhawk football season was decided. our little bandwagon hit the proverbial bump in the road and alas many have fallen off. we made history this year so i'll leave it at that until our bowl game which will hopefully happen in january in phx or san diego. losing to those missouri bastards wasn't exactly what i wanted but give them their due for beating us on an off night for us not them.

we're just shy of december and lo and behold the harsh reality of doing business in what is a seasonal part of the world is starting to sink in. i prefer working less but that doesn't mean the bills disappear. on the upside we glean the customers who are in for the long haul with us. we had a fine birthday party last eve. for our friend jorie modrich and her crew as well as visitors from camas who when all was said and done made for just the right mix. we enjoyed their company immensely. there were a couple of testy moments involving the remote control and the tv but isn't control of the remote what life is really all about? ain't it like the tv to make us all realize what really controls our lives. about the only remote i was thinking at that point was an island without the box that is actually watching us. thank the lord that wine was the mediator. i would encourage you all to drink more wine and watch less tv unless of course the jayhawks are involved.

should you have any input or feedback i'm all ears and feet. time to check on ratso the catso and turn the heater on in the crib so i can fully appreciate the fact that i have heat, running water, a roof over my head and many friends. on this sunday after thanksgiving those are some of the many things i'm truly thankful for. let's not forget that we live in the greatest country in the world and that in and of itself is worth more than most can imagine. start spreading the christmas cheer if you're inclined and remember the most important part---peace on earth and good will toward men and women. until i have a minute to write me thoughts again i'll leave you with this. it's only money.

hooba who loves change but prefers the bills

the blog lives via the website

2007-11-13T15:18:00.000-08:00

hooba here

just making sure the blog lives on the website

mother's day

2007-05-09T22:53:00.000-07:00

hooba here

geez louise. why not remind me that it's been a week or so. sometimes i get caught up in work and forget that i need to let you kids know what's going on therefore i am remiss in my chores. cinco de mayo was the proverbial shit. just when the crowd showed up and decided to put the onus on the kitchen, john and i said that we would have none of that and as fate would have it we avoided implosion while serving every person who decided to order the special. that smokin' chicken burrito was more popular than i ever figured. next time i'll have something less appealing. for some reason i got sidetracked. forgive me. can i be candid? please?

for those of you who might have an agenda or an idea to share with hooba i must let you know that after almost a year of listening to all of the people who told me what i should do i decided to do what i know best and for that am thankful. you reach a point in life wherein you say to yourself " i may not be right but by god i'm going to do it my way" and i shall continue to steer the course as i see fit. speaking of steers or beef as is the case is i have found that my burgers are about as good or better than can be found here in this part of the gorge. i must thank my friend jim hannah for that as he raises the beef and delivers it to me fresh. so fresh you'll want to slap it. that reminds me of the last time i was slapped but we needn't go into details at this point. let's just say i thought i was being nice and she was awfully cute. what the hell was her name anyway? she was the woman of my dreams i think. i'll reminisce for now. i get points for spelling that correctly, not that but reminisce.

we can't let this opportunity go by without acknowledging our mothers. let's not forget that besides the woman who bore us there were the "mother's of invention" thanks to frank zappa. i love my mother to death but she really didn't play the guitar. i'll give her props for the potato salad and the lemon meringue pie but frank worked the axe like no one else i've seen. again i would encourage you to find at least a cd or two that does justice to the time and temperament of your lives. i'm sure you can find a song or two that is appropriate. i might just put his rendition of whatever on the bose to relive some of my youth. i continue to be youthful and i would suggest you do the same. thoughts of this weeks menu are dancing in my head and with that in mind let me know what you would like to eat and we'll see if we can't make that happen. until i see the smile on your face i will leave you with this. some people prefer cupcakes, i for one care less for them.

hooba the dishwasher

a little dance around the maypole

2007-04-30T23:18:00.000-07:00

greeetings kids

hooba here, on the eve of may day. many of you have never experienced what the first of may has to offer so i shall enlighten you. in my day there was a celebration commemorating something that had to do with a pole. this was long before i ever encountered strippers and the like, so the pole was generally outdoors and encompassed a little frolic of sorts to celebrate springtime. most folks would express their ardor with flowers and the obligatory dance around said pole which may have been decorated in various motifs. keep it clean my friends. one year in college i was the recipient of flowers from a certain woman who fancied me at the time so i took it upon myself to learn of the tradition. in that vein i will try to continue it and will probably pick flowers from a neighbors backyard to present to the current woman of my desire. no thanks to match.com. anyway.

we opened two weeks ago last friday and i must say that i am pleased with the progress here at the little place in the burgs of southern washington. most of the locals are a bit confused by the "hooba's here" sign and consequently they drive by scratching their heads. now and then one will call the number at the bottom and inquire as to what a hooba is. i'm here to tell you it's not what "a hooba is" rather what "hooba's is". this little vision of mine is beginning to take shape and for that i'm thankful. i wandered aimlessly for many months until it occured to me that it will be what the locals want it to be. i will admit that when it all is said and done i will be the ultimate decision maker. hooba will say that if you're inclined to be anything but relaxed and tolerant you could be a bit disappointed. i encourage a healthy repartee but draw the line at politics, discrimination, and religion. i had an instance yesterday whence i had to remind some of my customers that we're not about gossip and the local goings on. enjoy the hamburger and fish tacos while waxing prolific on the grandkids or weather but leave your heartfelt and earnest opinions to yourself please. with that said we shall see what evolves.

i was fortunate to meet a new friend this past weekend and for that am thankful. hopefully she will not be the last person to visit from afar. i'm guessing the photos snapped will not appear on a website of ill repute and i would discourage you all from searching for them. nothing compromising i'm sure. i think. would you be so kind as to snap a photo or two and send me a copy to display here in the shop to let others know just how much fun we're having in beautiful husum, washington? remember it's your seat so don't tell anybody about this place. the goal is determined by the means of getting there. however you get here do it. we'll be celebrating cinco de mayo this weekend so enjoy the fact that we have our own independence day coming soon. the first annual husum fourth of july parade is just around the corner. join us. the kitchen floor has been sufficiently scrubbed so i shall head to the hills. is you is or is you ain't? be who you are with a bit more kindness and i shall see you soon.

hooba the matchless

hooba weathers the weekend

2007-04-22T23:06:00.000-07:00

hooba here

greetings and salutations--look it up--. good news my friends i made it thru the weekend with minimal help and numerous customers who are beginning to hop on the bandwagon. for those of you who are reluctant i understand your trepidation. the buzz of interest in what's going on here in husum at my modest little hangout is starting to matriculate throughout the community and surrounding area. being without help, yet not helpless, i spent some time worrying about this weekend during the days leading up to it. friday was another fine day to be here and many new customers chose to find out what the sandwich board at the road proclaiming "hooba's here" was all about. i winged it until my substitute help arrived and from there we made food and beverage service seem like a walk in the park. ron & don, dave and ron, chris and dave, roger and laurie, steve and jill, and all the rest who wandered in got hooba into a bit of a tizzy. when our local health inspector showed up about five thirty imagine what was going thru my mind. i inadvertantly left my waste receptacle in the area of the hand wash sink and for that was penalized. minus the bleach water added another 5 points and thus my first inspection was less than perfect. note the abscence of anything food related. once hooba started cookin' things were happenin'. i would suggest you claim your spot as a regular before we run out of said spots. remember--don't tell anyone about this place as it's your seat.

in our search for the most perfect environment i decided to purchase a satellite radio set up only to find it mobile instead of in house. we shall try to rectify that in the near future because many of the patrons don't cotton much to hooba's taste for classical music. seems as though everyone's a dj these days. where hooba grew up there were two kinds of music--country and western-- so imagine my chagrin when the only station with good reception is constantly derided as un hooba like. try as i might culture is still a ways off here in the wilds of southern washington. i'm thinking that the entire zappa catalog on shuffle might just be what the locals are wanting and with the help of a friend in phx that could come to fruition. i must email him directly. frank's rendition of black napkins is truly a classic and having my own chrome dinette in house i constanly think of his obscure "one size fits all" album which makes some of this new music reek of child's play. should you not be acquainted with his legacy of brilliant music i would suggest you rush out and procure some for your home listening pleasure. he is truly the egg of all persuasions.

hooba's hopes of finding mrs. right via the internet has sadly come to an end after almost 6 months of advertising via cyberspace. seems as though i was overly optimistic in my expectations and consequently have been sorely disappointed in the results so will forthwith cease giving money to what apparently is a scam. i would much rather send the money directly to vegas to play the 4 or 10 on the craps table in hopes of riding it to my great fortune. if any of you have suggestions or better yet a rich, single female in the family that meets certain criteria please let me know and i will send you the money i was spending on computer dating. if she doesn't do dishes it won't work. call me old fashioned but those who cook don't clean up and as many of you know i've done a bit of cooking over the years but alas am still the dishwasher, among other things. hooba wears many hats. i shan't be detered in my mission although many say it's impossible. on that note i will bid you adieu. i think that's french. until next time i hope you stop by and enjoy my humble little establishment for what it is. husum's hangout.

hooba the wifeless

jeez april already?

2007-04-17T20:27:00.000-07:00

hooba here

seems like just yesterday i logged on but alas there are some new hoops to jump thru. being short on the technology side of cooking i guess i was just short of simmering. we opened on friday the 13th and lo and behold the crowd was nothing short of awesome. i left no stone unturned in my quest to deliver. the fish tacos and the burgers seemed to be the cats meow. the pickled onions were the shit but the pickles per se were a bit understated. nobody seemed to mind that we were a bit short of staff and as luck would have it my friend joe jumped in to help and we were saved. we had but one small child and no high chairs but they were warned. nobody seemed to mind the lack of ranch dressing so we shall persevere. we might one day have a ranch dressing night but you will have to bring your own. i'm thinking liver loaf and the aforementioned dressing with crackers. throw the crackers and dressing away and enjoy the organ meat.

play magic fingers play. i got to start all over again. can i change my mind? do i have a mind? i'll leave that for you to decide. i wanna change my mind, i wanna change my mind. i am the chrome dinette, i am the eggs of all persuasions. this is becoming rather tedious so i shall defer to the next post. good night austin texas wherever you are. is you is or is you ain't? au revoir and sheet.

hooba the thoughtless

hibernation is over

2007-03-30T11:50:00.000-07:00

greetings fellow winter sleepers

hooba here? back from a long winters nap. while snoozing i had a dream about finally opening and keeping pace with the blog. so here we go. just got back from san jose and the west regional finals. alas sad to report that my jayhawks didn't quite get over the hump against ucla but nonetheless got a little farther than we've been accustomed to of late. hooba says once the jayhawks lose it's time for baseball and come sunday we'll have just that. i took copious audio recordings on my trip and one day might share some of the seamy side of santa clara with you all. suffice it to say that me moving to california any time soon is about as likely as winning the lottery. not quite sure what's not to like about that part of the world but if i started listing things it might require a bigger blog. we had a fine round of golf and actually i made a dozen or more amazing shots considering i hadn't played since last fall. next hole in one and i quit for good.

the menu is shaping up quite nicely and after much abuse from the locals i have reconsidered a few things. i will serve burgers and a few other mainstays but the menu itself will be a bit cryptic to insure that when my customers peruse they have more questions than answers. the spackler special will take on a life of it's own and may even contain an ingredient still living to really set it apart from the ordinary and mundane. we'll redefine fresh here at hooba's on a regular basis. it'll be "so fresh you'll want to slap it" might be the jingle for the commercials which are soon to air to insure our survival. chances are they will end up in the same place many of my emails and cell calls go. if any of you can locate some of those please send them back to me as i forgot what i said.

my cyber dating attempts have ground woefully to a trickle and that may be mother nature's way of telling me i'm not quite on the same level as the competition. i get high marks for the profile verbage and humor but today's woman must be looking for more substance and as most of you who know me can attest, substance is generally something that's abused by many so hooba will refrain from making any attempt to incorporate it into his character or social life. most of my suitors get a bit literal and thus words like moxie, absurd, imagination, please, thank you, escape many. i must say the percentage of candidates who are a bit grammatically challenged is higher than hooba ever anticipated. i may be destined for single life until death but will not lower my standards regarding the use of the king's english. should you know of any likely matches in your world for cousin hooba please feel free to play matchmaker and i'll send you the check instead of match.com.

off to bottle wine with joel. keep me in mind as i've about lost mine and i will look forward to our next chat.

hooba the hibernator

hooba survives thanksgiving

2006-11-27T14:39:00.000-08:00

hooba here

apologies for being awol but hooba has been a bit under the weather and really just needed a timeout from the rigors of opening a restaurant. just when i thought i had overcome the first bit of illness for the season round two snuck up on me a day or so later. nothing serious but enough to keep my profile low. i know many of you appreciate a low or no profile from yours truly but i try to remain in the loop even if it's my own personal squirrel cage. makes me think of the endless circular motion that at times qualifies as life. hooba prefers linear with a few ups and downs to keep him honest.

the extrememly large turkey sandwich that was constructed for consumption last thursday was quite a hit for the folks that showed up but alas we were a few people short of a full house and there was plenty of sandwich left to eat. no problem as the temperature in the winery was such that it made for a great next day feast for those who journeyed up to the tasting room. word around town was positive and so we'll do another sometime soon for another special occasion. i'm always soliciting suggestions for a new tradition for any holiday and welcome yours. i will say this it was more work than i anticipated and if you're inclined to do so yourself i might encourage you to think twice as there are professionals out there that do an adequate job to save you a lot of work. i doubt we'll feature it on the menu here at hooba's.

speaking of the menu we are in the final process of refining it and are still up in the air about a couple of dishes that would bring great pleasure to the customers. the organ meat still is undecided and that vegetarian part of the population has still not weighed in on their options. i would encourage those of you to do so as the time is getting short. hooba thinks vegetarian has plenty of options and if i had my way it will exclude tofu. i do have my way so it will be sans tofu. any objections? i'll keep the lasagne meat free and have a seafood item or two so that should cover all the bases. as a voter i think the likelihood of a female president is greater than a vegetarian in power. you gotta have meat to secure that red state vote if i do say so myself. no more politics today and probably throughout the holidays.

hooba's all about peace on earth and good will toward men, not just for christmas but throughout the year. if you saw any video on the news about last friday's shopping frenzy you could see for yourself that good will toward men had a day off. my question is when we're killing each other over a playstation 3 what does that say about the christmas spirit? hooba decided years ago that the commercialization of the holidays had flattened any hope of a civil attitude that included kindness and sharing. correct me if i'm wrong. in the spirit of kindness and giving we'll take a shot at getting those who need it more of the christmas cheer and for hooba that usually includes egg nog and other seasonal libations. send us your favorite seasonal libation recipe for huge discounts here at the restaurant. if they're drinkable and sufficiently spread cheer you'll be notified of your success. i look forward to the input.

hooba will end this spiel with a hearty congrats to his alma maters' basketball team for their fine effort against the number one team in the land--those florida gators--after nearly letting one get away at the end of regulation we regrouped in overtime to seal the victory. it's early yet but hooba likes what he saw.

rock chalk hooba the snowbound

hooba loves any organ

2006-11-14T21:02:00.000-08:00

hooba here

i've spent the last two days back in camas wandering through the old haunts and checking on friends. my guess is they're not likely to forget yours truly anytime soon. in the spirit of gossip hooba decided to tell some of the locals that he's going to be a father. the look of amazement on the faces of the lucky few who get to pass on this information was truly a sight to behold. realizing that most were inclined to think of parenthood i didn't bother to tell them i was really thinking about entering the monastery. the mere fact that most of these places make wine is enough for me to consider giving up on this endeavor to consider the spiritual life. as most of you know i'm all about spirits and in particular those which manifest themselves after spending a year or so inside an oak barrel. the rigor and discipline required to maintain the lifestyle of the brotherhood caused me to reconsider at the last minute so i will probably rethink my life of sacrifice and celibacy. that celibacy thing is not necessarily what i think but what the opposite sex has in mind. if i had any idea what they had in mind i could profit handsomely.

that brings me to the weekly update of my escapades surfing the web in hopes of cyberdating. i'll try to be nice and hold my tongue but if the results are any indication hooba and celibacy will be a match.com made in heaven. not that i'm looking for a tawdry affair or roll in the hay but i must admit that many of the available women are disguising their intentions while inferring it's all about cuddling and pda's. call me old fashioned if you must but hooba can cuddle about as much as cats can swim. don't get me started on pda's as i'm generally the person shouting "get a room" when i see any couple engaged in a lip lock, grope session that would lead me or anybody else to think that sex while still fully clothed is par for the course. nothing against golf mind you and hooba knows what you're thinking about that hole in one thing. innuendo aside many of the displays of public affection nowadays make me think myself a bit of a prude. correct me if i'm wrong but methinks if you're getting your kicks putting on a show at the bar or restaurant one can only imagine what's left when it's time to get down to business when nobody's watching. i'll continue to carry the torch for wholesome and proper.

my friend joel and i decided it's time to start making this place look like the wine shop/bar and restaurant it's going to be so we started pulling the wine out of the boxes and merchandising them for the sake of the nonexistent customers who have been frequenting hooba's. i will say this we've got some smokin' wines and vintages and that in itself whould be reason enough to at least come check the place out. should that not be enough i've been doing some more menu design and with the input from my friend the senator i have decided that no menu is complete without organ meat. the french call them offals=awful, hooba and his friends refer to them as gizzzards, liver, tongue, and well you get the idea. many of you ate such delicacies as youngsters in the form of bologna and god forbid hot dogs. i was fortunate that i stopped by the local butcher shop on sunday and sampled some of the best organs available disguised as liver and bacon loaf as well as head cheese. hooba endured many meals in his youth that had some jello concoction garnished with things such as carrots, raisins, and cottage cheese. i'm here to tell you that the same gelatin we were duped into believing was such a swell deal is even better in it's colorless form garnished with chunks of offals. braunschweiger and liver loaf are really just poor mans pate and foie gras. if those peta folks have their way there'll be no such thing to enjoy soon. you can rest assured that liver loaf and hot dogs are well beyond their reach. i would encourage you all to swallow your pride and sample that which is becoming a relic in the food world. let me know what you think. the menu will reflect the feedback i receive and quite honestly you may even ask what that fine dish you can't identify consisted of. be brave.

i'll leave you all with this thought--i got a new cd courtesy of joel that is a bluegrass cover of def leppard and i can only say that it's better than anything the imposters ever did. check it out if you don't believe me. why would you believe hooba? it's not so offal.

au revoir hooba the organ grinder

hooba's cabinet

2006-11-08T19:42:00.000-08:00

hooba here

the results are in and thanks to all of you who voted. don't you feel better now knowing that a thumpin' was administered with this election. our fearless leader described the events as a "thumpin'" for his party and while i must admit i've been to a few parties where thumpins' were a part of the festivities, none were politically motivated. generally elevated testosterone seemed to be the platform that encouraged the discourse to morph into a free for all that usually ended up with local law enforcement types involved. most of you realize that hooba doesn't need much motivation to party and prefers to keep politics out of the equation while consuming adult beverages. when or if i do decide to run, i find that out the back door is your best bet. you can always get the car later. so i guess if you're a democrat let the party begin but please don't use the same tired excuses to explain your lack of leadership as i tend toward originality even if it's not quite the truth. we look forward to the next excercise in the constitutional process. not that i'm advocating excercise mind you but hey the experts suggest we raise our heart rates on occasion and therefore i'll go get a beer and be right back.

in the spirit of leadership and bi-partisan cooperation hooba is exploring the possibility of assembling a cabinet for his new venture. the kitchen itself lacks even the most basic or rudimentary storage facilities but that won't stop me from fashioning a space capable of holding every piece of equipment and utensil imaginable. i spent the afternoon rearranging the 400 sq. ft. or so that comprises the kitchen and found that with some imagination i could transform my work area into a cross between the city dump--we call them transfer stations here in husum--and a version inspired by extreme makeover. picture if you can a large square. put a smaller square inside the larger one and you'll get an idea of the flow. all kitchens need flow and if it keeps raining flow will take on a new meaning as the leak in the roof is right in the middle. this is a very scientific process designed to eliminate wasted steps, motions, space, and thought. now you see where i come into the mix as wasted thought is generally the result i have when trying to do something scientific. hooba is a creative, right side of the brain type animal and thus has to think and rethink the entire process constantly. since i have no cabinets you can begin to see my dilemma and why it's better to be creative rather than scientific. i think back to algebra and realize now exactly what pie are square means. i'm befuddled--this might require another beer. the ceiling height discourages hanging anything as my head tends to notice that most everything is too low. i avoided the thumpins' at most of the parties but the ceiling will make up for lost time and my head has enough knots already. as geoff goldblum said in his remake of "the fly" help me, help me.

many of you are curious as to how hooba's will be staffed. i'll take my cue from the executive branch of our government and create meaningless puppet positions--i.e. fema-- for the sake of a least appearing to be a fine dining establishment. you are likely familiar with those charts that look like a family tree. thankfully my family tree had many branches but that won't keep me from constructing something innovative and cutting edge. there are those who think our tree needs a little trimming with yours truly the first to be pruned but hooba thrives on skeptics. i'll be the chef, sous chef, line cook, prep cook, pantry person, saucier, poissonier, entremetier, patisserie, boulangerie, dishwasher, pot scrubber, janitor, and handyman. i like hats. the front of the house will be staffed by my new asst. and all round professional wait person the one and only dawn. she has local cred and a legion of diners willing to follow her to the trough. trust me if we don't find anymore help soon we'll be serving from a trough. that would certainly make my job easier. those of you from the midwest might remember those feedlots that seemed to be very efficient at feeding large numbers of critters in a very short time. we're all about efficiency here at hooba's. seriously it's all about the food not necessarily the presentation. correct me if i'm wrong. when you're ready to strap on the feed bag we'll be here with the oats.

i'm off to the refrigerator again so i'll leave you with the musings of one frank zappa--i am the chrome dinette, i am the eggs of all persuasions--when you visit you'll get it. we're toying with the idea of bringing your own plate. se ya around like a donut.

hooba the perplexed

but did you vote?

2006-11-06T14:56:00.000-08:00

hooba here---

we'll cut to the chase. did you vote? i repeat did you vote? ok then shut up if you didn't. nothing hooba hates worse than a bunch of mealy mouthing, whiny, hand wringing doom sayers telling us all how things continue to go from bad to worse when in fact a good percentage of them forgot the one critical element for maintaining this lifestyle we call democracy. if the local gubernatorial ads are any indication we'll eventually all be stuck with those same folks in charge of our descent into the septic system of demise. hooba promotes clean and ethical. i would encourage appropriate participation in this inalienable rite we each have just for living here. as many of you may have noticed the days of "love it or leave it" are long gone. getting here is obstacle enough for most and leaving won't happen unless our paranoia overwhelms the main guiding principles of the founding fathers--"life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness"--and building a wall to keep people out is our answer to illegal immigration? hooba's question is "what was so legal about the pilgrims"immigrating back in 1629 or whenever? i've got better things to do.

speaking of the pursuit of happiness, yours truly spent the weekend in walla walla researching the minutiae and mundane for the restaurant. how much wine can one person drink? that was not the task at hand rather a long overdue introduction to a nice young lady who has attracted the fancy of your proprietor. with over 70 tasting rooms one can easily be overwhelmed with choices so i opted for the most likely. spending time with an attractive local female was more fun than sampling the well crafted local vintages. we did make our way to a handful of wineries and even helped with some production. i'll keep you posted on the results. that pie chart is now a necessity to track the totals for hooba's match.com escapades. let just say my date redeemed the female population of said internet dating service. she actually is as she had advertised which is saying something nowadays. re: political ads. to say that hooba deserves better than most out there can offer is a fact so i don't mind saying it. mealy mouthing ain't cuttin' it for me either so we'll indulge in shameless self promotion and ego inflation. should we set a date i'll need a caterer as yours truly will be busy. i'm easy but lil' smokies in bbq sauce is a little beneath the mrs. the more silverware the better.

at the urging of many of my future local patrons i will address the decor of hooba's. i prefer motif as my decorating adjective because it speaks volumes more than decor. my inspiration was slow in coming but with the onset of elk hunting season the answer hit me like a 30-06 shell right between the eyes. what colors define hunting more than orange and camoflage? trust me camoflage is a color just check out the wedding photos in some of those small ozark burgs and you'll see what i mean. if it's good enough for the bride and groom it's got hooba's written all over it. i'm thinking shades of brown, green, grey, and that smoking blue which has popped into the "camo" vernacular, so to speak, with a panache that trumpets fine, casual dining at it's understated, and barely noticeable best. ambiance aside the interior of our establishment will make you feel like you're not there to be seen or heard and with the racket from the kitchen a few short feet away being heard will be impossible. we anticipate that our customers will blend into the space in much the same way many of our ingredients do to create these fabulous meals that we'll have trouble duplicating for years to come--should we survive the first. to offset the blending of the surroundings we'll be the only establishment that i'm aware of to feature the boldness of hunter safety orange as a table accent. accent my ass we're going all the way by using it for our table cloths. starched black napkins will dull the gleam of the silverware and help "camoflage" any food particles or scum that may be stuck to the utensils and silverware even after they've been washed and sanitized. the mishmash of chipped and cracked china, bric-a-brac, and goofy vases and candles will be a visual feast with that orange background and will shout a warning much like the color that inspired it. i can't be happier with this bit of inspiration because it has been causing many sleepless nights tossing and turning and worrying about the visual impact the restaurant will make. i learned years ago that if they don't remember the food they'll at least come back one more time to try and remember what was so memorable about the place. we can't guarantee your safety after sundown so get here early for numerous reasons, especially during the winter months. enough said.

we'll address other concerns in the future but for now i'll bid adieu as the rain has found it's way to the kitchen floor which means either i have a leak or it's raining sideways. both are a likely possibility. i've got a pot of smoking green chile stew waiting to be consumed and hopefully you'll get your chance soon. saddam's guilty? are you kidding me? how'd oj get off? a jury of your peers is another thing that voting insures. i'll be on jury duty. until next time.

hooba the mindless

dias de las muertos

2006-11-02T11:27:00.000-08:00

hooba here--

i've been in a funk for the past few days so apologies to those of you who haven't read any of this. we're still searching for that first hit. when i last wrote we were wrangling with an opening date for husum's fine new dining establishment and we may have penciled in a date, now we just need to narrow it down to what year. i have however had a moment or two of inspiration regarding the menu and am ready to streamline and refine it. we will include a "spackler special" for our guests and whichever one of you can identify for whom said dish is named you'll be the lucky recipient of one on your next visit. the descriptions of the menu items will be brief to avoid scrutinizing those with verbal and culinary shortcomings as you would hate to be ridiculed or scorned for being ignorant of the most basic understanding. hooba prides himself on being able to confuse his customers with simple descriptive adjectives. think basic and you will have a good idea of what the menu will be.

now to more important things. i survived halloween and the obligatory parties that require costumes while thinking to myself what the attraction is to trying to be "someone we're not" for a day. i realized that most of the zealous participants probably wished they were someone else. my choice for best costume went to "jacques custodian" who outfitted himself as a scuba diver with cleaning supplies. he danced remarkably well with flippers. two hours and two beers were about all i could stand so i returned to my normal state and planned for the trick or treat activities ahead. the little scamps were a tad sparse here in the country and some of that might have been because word got around that hooba was giving away hot sauce packets from taco bell. i found a drawer full of them and thought what better way to use them rather than throw them in the trash. a little spice to temper that sugar rush seemed the best way to keep the ghouls on an even keel for the remainder of the evening. it seemed at the time a novel way to educate the local adolescent population who will soon be the hosts or hostesses of the halloween parties of the future. whatever happened to bobbing for apples? enlighten hooba please!

i wandered back to camas yesterday to tend to landlord chores and was surprised at the number of people who actually missed me and inquired about my new venture. many of the folks are envious of yours truly and wish they could escape to anywhere even if it's just one night at a halloween party. i offered my sympathy and encouraged them to come visit as hooba's will be home to the poor, tired, huddled masses for which the statue of liberty no longer has any use. hooba will not discriminate. speaking of discrimination i have been the victim of such treatment by many of the women of match.com. as you know i'm seeking my true love via the internet and quite honestly the results have been disappointing. next summers family reunion is still in the planning stages but i think it time i found a woman to introduce as mrs. hooba and hopefully make the nuptials part of the festivities. what better way to say family than by marrying a gal with five or six kids needing a father figure and role model for the nippers. i am seeking some input from you technophiles as to how to construct a pie chart to attach to the blog for keeping score with this match/not a match.com activity. i'm off to walla walla on sat. for another meeting with a potential match. i'll let you know how it goes.

today is daniel boone's birthday so we'll end with a fitting quote by him---
"i have never been lost but admit to being confused for a couple of weeks"--rather fitting for hooba

enjoy the feast of the day of the dead adios hooba

When are you going to open?

2006-10-28T13:33:00.000-07:00

hooba here!

many of you have been asking just that question and quite honestly i tire of hearing it asked. i started to compile a list of those who continue to be nosy and have decided that they may indeed have already been 86'd before i even open. you must realize that this endeavor has required much mental wrangling which is to say i have to think about it and most of you know that hooba and think isn't exactly a match made in heaven. speaking of match i've been having the time of my technolife cruising match.com. to say that i'm not exactly in the same league with most of the women who are taking up valuable space there is an understatement but i'm honing my typing skills and sharpening my rapier wit. credit to bronte in lajolla for the adjective rapier. as you can see i'm also increasing my vocabulary on a scale i'd never dreamed possible while reliving high school english. although not a formal footnote at least i gave credit where it is due. my profile on match is such that i easily seperate the "wheat from the chaff"--a kansas euphemism for eliminating the unnecessary stuff. trust me many of these women have stuff but are trying to disguise it with descriptions that make it seem like divorced with kids is the norm. i'm here to tell you that i've never been divorced and have no kids and consider myself normal. that's a subject for another day. realistically if i can ever pull myself away from my new addiction i may find time to open the restaurant. does that answer your question?

you may have noticed the photo of me helping with crush last week. it was truly a beautiful, sunny, autumn afternoon here in the gorge. like most jobs you start in a position for which you feel you are overqualified and i was no exception. joel added to my feelings of low self esteem by removing the tines from the rake and then instructed me to use it in a manner which i was unaccustomed to. after some discussion of what i thought it should be used for and where he could put it "with my assistance" we began the process of feeding the grapes into the crusher/destemmer. having some background in the agricultural arena of life i was a quick study so obviously had time for a photo op to document the experience. i like to have my picture taken--frequently i might add--so next time you're in the neighborhood please bring your cameras and we'll have some fun with them. i would hope that the results don't find their way to some internet site in hopes of humiliating yours truly thus bringing about the downfall of the restaurant before it even opens. you'll have only yourselves to blame and i can always get a job cooking up at the big house. there tends to be a little more structure to life at said house but it is generally the lack of discipline that lands the tenants there in the first place.

we may have a CUSTOMER RECIPE CONTEST here at hooba's to help inspire the menu that as yet does not exist. i frequently solicit ideas and advice from people i don't even know for things such as my business plan, kitchen design, wine list etc., just for the sake of gleaning information that i might find useful. quite honestly my friends the input i seek has been slow in coming but that could be a result of where i choose to solicit this information and the fact that when i leave i have impaired my memory to such a degree that most has been lost or forgotten. that in itself has some merit as once we're open that may be a definite advantage for those of you who frequent hooba's. i don't encourage impairment but sometimes forgetting is the best way to overcome the feelings of dissatisfaction and the downright insolent treatment you may be subjected to here at my fine establishment. should you have some input you can post it right here and now. there are certain descriptive adjectives that might not be appropriate so temper your tongue and save those comments for when i see you once we're open. just remember--"don't tell anybody about this place as it's your seat."--thanks to bill at the red lion for that sage advice from my college days. as porky would say "tha, tha, tha, that's all for now folks." i'll be in touch---hooba

Hooba's introduction to wines beginnings

2006-10-25T09:24:00.000-07:00